5 Relationship Tips I Wish Every New Parent Knew (Before Baby Arrives)

Pregnancy is full of advice.

Some of it is helpful.

Some of it is overwhelming.

And some of it—like “sleep now while you can”—is well-intentioned but completely unrealistic.

As a therapist who works with couples and new parents, and as someone who has lived this transition myself, I’ve seen the same thing again and again:

Most expecting parents spend a lot of time preparing for the baby…

and very little time preparing for the emotional and relational shift that comes with becoming parents.

And yet, that shift changes everything.

That’s why I made a YouTube video specifically for expecting parents— to talk about what actually helps during pregnancy if your goal is to feel more grounded, more connected, and more supported once the baby arrives.

You can’t “sleep now while you can”—but you can protect your nervous system

Let’s clear something up right away:

You cannot stockpile sleep.

That advice often leaves expecting parents feeling like they’re already failing before the baby even arrives.

What does help is giving yourself small moments of rest now— a short nap, a quiet shower, a slow morning, or a few minutes where you’re not “on.”

From a nervous-system perspective, those small resets matter.

They help you enter postpartum with more emotional capacity and less depletion.

Practice asking for help before you desperately need it

Asking for help is a skill—and for many of us, it’s an uncomfortable one.

If it feels hard during pregnancy, it usually becomes even harder postpartum, when you’re exhausted and vulnerable.

Practicing phrases like:

“Can you take this?”

“Can you help me with this?”

…now builds a habit of teamwork instead of silent burnout later.

Make the invisible load visible

So much of parenting is invisible work—planning, remembering, anticipating, managing.

If couples don’t talk about who is handling what before the baby arrives, resentment tends to creep in quickly after.

Conversations about meals, appointments, night wakings, household tasks, and mental load aren’t unromantic—they’re protective.

Clarity now prevents conflict later.

Create one tiny ritual of connection

When life gets busy (and it will), relationships are sustained by small, repeatable moments.

A 10-second hug.

A nightly check-in.

Sitting together quietly before bed.

These moments don’t need to be big.

They just need to be consistent.

They become anchors in a season that can feel unpredictable and overwhelming.

Expect emotional changes—for both of you

Pregnancy and new parenthood don’t just change one person.

They change both partners—and the relationship itself.

Your identity shifts.

Your stress response shifts.

Your communication shifts.

That doesn’t mean something is wrong.

It means you’re growing.

Meeting these changes with curiosity instead of fear makes this transition gentler for everyone involved.

Watch the Video

If you’re pregnant, expecting, or preparing for parenthood—and you want support that goes beyond checklists and gear—I’d really encourage you to watch the full video here:

Watch: RelationshipTips for New Parents 

This video is about preparing not just for a baby, but for becoming parents together—with more connection, more clarity, and more compassion.

You’re not just preparing for a baby — you’re becoming parents.

And you deserve support in that transformation, too.

Catherine O’Brien is a couples therapist in Sacramento, CA who helps parents reconnect, communicate, and thrive—even during the busiest seasons of life. HappyWithBaby.com| Book An Appointment